vegetarian food

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Maybe I’m Just Really Hungry

March 2, 2011 | No comments

lolaThis nice little comic strip is from Lara over at Lola Lollipop. It reminds me that, however I feel about eating quality vegetarian food and maintaining an exercise regime that sustains the svelt, debonair figure you see on my contact page, whatever anyone else wants to eat is none of my damn business.

Obviously there are shades of politically incorrect food - Foie Gras and the like being at the extreme end of the scale. But honestly, are you really going to tell other people what to eat? Where do you stop with that philosophy? In order to be consistent in your approach you’d have to tell people how to behave in public, what kind of jobs to choose, which mode of transport to take, and which side to dress on (one for the gentlemen). What am I, your mother? Work it out dumbo.

Next you’ll be telling people which party to vote for. But what if you, like most vegetarians, have extreme right wing views? That’s a good way to lose friends.

I always hated that Billy Joel song where he says this is my life go ahead with your own life leave me alone. Think it’s called 52nd Street. But he has a point. Leave me alone.

Wonder if there’s a vegetarian equivalent of Foie Gras. Would probably involve stuffing pumpkins or something and therefore be considered cruel by many veggies.

Maybe I could start a new political party. Non-Fascist Vegetarians. Not likely to get much support from meat-eaters though. And other vegetarians wouldn’t know what non-fascist meant.

- George

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Pumpkins – From Seed To Triffid In A Few Short Weeks

October 25, 2010 | No comments

pumpkin4It’s going to be a bumper Halloween here in the Armstong household. For those of you unfamiliar with my pumpkin dilemmas, see My Growing Pumpkin Concern for the full saga of my experiences growing pumpkins for the first time.

As you can see from the picture the results turned out just fine. It was actually quite a thrilling process, about as thrilling as vegetables can be, because pumpkin growth is pretty dramatic. These babies grow from seed to triffid in a few short weeks and they’re no respecters of garden boundaries, as my neighbors will testify.

To watch pumpkins grow is to study all of nature in a microscosm, albeit an XL-sized microcosm. They have a short little lifespan that belies their mammoth proportions, but in that lifespan you will see an array of grand design functions in action. And this may be one of my more controversial theories, but I think pumpkins are smart. 

By way of evidence for such a sweeping and frankly silly statement I present the following:

  • Exhibit A: Pumpkin plants don’t like to be watered directly, preferring to stretch their roots out to find water and thereby extending those roots. In order to protect themselves from rain and divert water to the area surrounding the plant they send up large, parasol-style leaves to act as umbrellas, not only around the plant base but also above each individual fruit.
  • Exhibit B: As a large, trailing plant with heavy vegetables attached, pumpkins realize they’re going to need support to stop everything thrashing around and possibly breaking the connection to the fruits in the event of a storm. So they send out secondary shoots along the trail whose only function is to wind themselves around anything handy - in my case, railings, other plants and the occasional chicken – and provide the utmost stability. Try moving a pumpkin trail mid-season and you’ll see it’s not so easy.
  • Exhibit C: Pumpkins have the most humungous flowers I’ve ever seen, attracting bees from as far away as Jupiter and ensuring their pollination.
  • Exhibit D: The plants realize there’s so much eating in the individual fruits, they ought to do something to prevent all that food going to waste. So they gave them a mild, vaguely sweet flavor that made them versatile enough to use in both savory and sweet dishes. (Nothing does go to waste in the Armstrong kitchen, even the seeds. Some of these are retained for next year’s crop, the remainder are seasoned up and baked for a tasty snack. Smart pumpkin. Knew I liked snacks.)

In the wild, left to their own devices, unclaimed pumpkins would degenerate into a compost leaving only the seeds behind. Then the whole cycle of life begins again. I think that’s pretty smart, don’t you? Happy Halloween.

- George

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Vegetarian Haggis – A Perfect Veggie Meal

January 25, 2010 | 2 comments

vegetarian haggisThis being the traditional Robert Burns night in Scotland, I asked Augustus Crimmond, our correspondent in Britain, if he would be celebrating with the traditional Scottish meal of haggis.

“Good God, no!” he declared. “I’m a vegetarian.” He sounded vaguely offended.

“What, you mean the idea of lamb’s heart, lungs and intestines cooked in a sheep’s stomach doesn’t appeal to you?” It was a rhetorical question of course, as I was reminded of Groundskeeper Willie in The Simpsons reciting the list of ingredients then announcing: “tastes as good as it sounds!” I also recall Mike Myers suggesting that all Scottish cuisine was based on a dare.

But the truth is that in Britain vegetarian haggis has become more popular than the traditional meat version, and there’s a very good reason for this – it’s absolutely delicious. It’s spicy, moist and complex and is sufficiently versatile to have been adapted in the recipes of many star chefs.

The veggie haggis replaces the original ingredients (which after all were a poverty driven exercise in using up leftovers) with carrots, mushrooms, lentils, kidney beans, hazelnuts and other goodies. Mixed with oatmeal, lemon, soy sauce, and a selection of herbs and spices it’s not only a very fulfilling meal but also a nutritious superfood brimming with healthy qualities. (See a complete recipe here.)

This year, though, the devil has a hold on me as I’ve decided to counter all this worthiness with an added whisky cream and strawberry sauce which, along with a tasty ‘dram’, will compliment this excellent dish wonderfully.

Also this year the US has finally lifted the ban on the import of haggis from Scotland and while I personally feel the ban should remain, purely on the grounds that the idea of the meat version makes me want to hurl, the upside of this may be that we see a variety of vegetarian versions soon on our shelves.

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A Vegetarian Lunch On The Run

November 24, 2009 | No comments

ShortbreadAugustus Crimmond, our roving food correspondent in the British Isles continues his quest for quality vegetarian food.

Upon visiting the high street of a town that should remain nameless I was struck by how much easier it should be to procure something hot, edible and importantly meat-free.  For many reasons in this part of the world finding vegetarian food can be challenging so here are a couple of thoughts about the current situation and what might be done about it.

Institutionalised meat eating is a recent phenomenon.  Aeons ago some bright spark realised that your average animal is unlikely to hang around long enough to be eaten and, fun though it may be, chasing through the undergrowth after some unfortunate creature is neither big nor clever and best left to carnivores.

If you eliminated the running-round-after-stuff you had two options. You could either migrate to where plants are in season; or for the stay-at-home type there was the chance to develop agriculture, preserving techniques and making best use of what’s available.  Over the years this group have developed skills with grains and grapes, a discussion for another time.

Things were going relatively well before the small matter of industrialisation.  Whole populations were chucked off their land in favour of livestock and encouraged to huddle together in miserable conditions subsisting on spam and bovril.

More recently some balance has been regained but those years are still indelibly stamped on the modern high street.  In the interests of research your correspondent visited a popular baking establishment in search of elevenses.  The encounter proceeded along the normal lines:

“Good Morning, Mr Crimmond. What can we get you today?”

“Good Day.  What do you have that is both hot, edible and does not include meat?” (A long, meaningful pause ensues while the baker’s assistant contemplates this culturally difficult request before scanning past the rows of grey meat pies to a sorry, forgotten corner of the cabinet.)

“Well – we’ve got quiche.”

It will not be the first time that I have reminded them that this could only on a very loose definition be thought to be vegetarian and in any case is full of ham.  At least they tried.

“Never mind, shortbread it is.”   The importance of biscuits in such moments of duress is not to be underestimated.  In particular, shortbread will get you through situations where Kendal Mint Cake will barely suffice.

Astute readers will point out that it is unwise to rely on such emporia and that Crimmond should have been better prepared with a packed lunch, preferably cooked from scratch.  You would be quite right.  Cooking from scratch is more fun, tastes better and will DO YOU GOOD.  All very true but at short notice this is not a climate well suited to alfresco cuisine and on-street emulations of the late Mr Keith Floyd are frowned upon by the authorities.

The point is – restaurants, cafes and bakeries can all lack imagination when catering for the non-carnivorous. Some manage brilliantly but alas they are in the minority. So it is up to us, the discerning public to let them know whether they are doing a good job or not; to question why they have only a single meatless dish on their menu and why it has such a strong resemblance to an item available pre-prepared for boiling in a bag.  It’s up to us for it will improve the casual culinary experience for everyone.

- Augustus Crimmond

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How To Make A Vegetarian Pizza From Scratch

November 22, 2009 | No comments

Vegetarian PizzaThere’s only one way to make sure you’re getting a first rate vegetarian pizza with quality ingredients – do it yourself. And that’s exactly what I’ve been doing most weekends for the last few years. I never tire of pizza and as far as I’m concerned Friday night is pizza night.

There’s a very good reason for this: home-made vegetarian pizza done properly is one of the most healthy and satisfying fast foods there is. There are even non-dairy cheeses for the fully vegan version, making this dish an absolute delight.

I must admit, even before I was vegetarian I never understood the idea of putting meat on a pizza. I mean pepperoni is tasty but all sausage products are major fat-fests and deeply unhealthy when you get down to it. Now they advertise these meat feasts which have minced beef and god knows what else on them. That just seems all wrong.

If you have a breadmaker this is really easy, but it’s not essential. It’s just that the breadmaker will do all the hard work in 45 minutes. So you don’t have to.

I always say this isn’t a recipe site but breaking with tradition here is my vegetarian pizza recipe. This will make two large pizzas. For the dough you’ll need:

240ml water
460grammes strong white flour
2 tablespoons of olive oil
1 level tablespoon of sugar
1 teaspoon of salt
1 large tablespoon wholemeal flour
1 sachet of dried yeast

Mix all these ingredients together and do some serious kneading. I’m talking about a good ten minutes worth until it has a nice elastic quality. Then leave it somewhere warm to rise, covered with an oiled piece of clingfilm, for at least half an hour until it’s roughly double the size. Then back to kneading, just a couple of minutes this time, then it’s ready for the rolling pin.

Brush a little oil mixed with dried or fresh herbs (oregano, basil, sage, rosemary, whatever Italian style herbs you have around) onto two large baking trays and crank up your oven to its hottest setting. The hotter the oven, the faster it will cook.

Well, you know what to do next. I use fresh sliced tomatoes, roasted peppers, green olives and fresh basil  but I vary this every week. That’s the beauty of pizza. Sliced artichoke hearts are very nice, spinach, red onion, mushrooms. You can use dairy-free cheese or if you are fine with dairy products then mozzarella or goat’s cheese are the best.

Sling them in the oven for around twenty minutes and there you go – probably the best vegetarian pizza you’ll ever have, and most certainly the healthiest.

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Cooking For A Vegetarian?

November 13, 2009 | No comments

If you’re having vegetarian guests round for dinner and you’re unfamiliar with vegetarian cooking, here are a few tips which will stop you making a culinary faux-pas, if there ever were such a thing.

The first thing to establish is what type of vegetarian they are. This can be a minefield for non-veggies because it covers quite a lot of ground. At it’s simplest level there those who will eat no animal produce whatsever, including cheese and dairy produce, those who just exclude all animal flesh including fish, and those who will eat fish and dairy but no other animal meat.

The best way to find this out is simply to ask your guests what they eat. Vegans and vegetarians of all descriptions are more than happy to explain at great length what they will and won’t eat. So much so that you’ll end up saying ‘ok ok I get it.’ Don’t make the mistake I made, long ago before I was a veggie, of assuming that tuna was acceptable for a vegetarian.

I had prepared the most elegant of starters, beef tomatoes stuffed with tuna and herbs, and had spent a good deal of time and care in it’s preparation. The guests arrived and after cocktails we sat down to dinner. The veggie in the group looked at the tomato quizzically and asked what was in it and, yes you guessed it, recoiled slightly when I told him the ingredients.

There might be militant veggies who won’t touch anything that isn’t the vegetable version of kosher, but most people are understanding about non-vegetarians’ cooking and if anything, my guest looked a little embarrassed by my mistake.

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How Do I Find The Best Vegetarian Restaurants?

November 13, 2009 | No comments

If you’re anything like me, taking a holiday can be a major headache. Not because I don’t like to travel or have a fear of flying or anything like that. But because I like to be prepared. That means I read up on where we’re going, have a vague idea of what we should visit when we get there and generally be the Felix Unger character in our relationship. (Ok that’s nothing like me, I hear you say.)

This is all very well but finding good vegetarian restaurants can be a real hit or miss affair. You can generally get not-bad vegetarian meals in whatever restaurant you choose (unless you’re in France – more on that in a minute) and often you can get lucky and find a place that cooks really good veggie fare.

One foursome holiday in the French countryside was nearly a disaster. Picture this – one vegetarian, one vegan, one lactose-intolerant and ovo-averse, one major carnivore – for two weeks in good old veggie-oblivious France. I had a feeling it might get interesting.

There was an ominous beginning to the trip when, lost on the outskirts of a small town and hungry enough to eat my shoelaces, we came across a Macdonalds. I know, I know. But there really was nothing else and we figured at least a a veggie burger would fix us up.

Mais non. They didn’t do veggie burgers or veggie anything for that matter. It was all I could to stop myself emptying one of our suitcases and getting them to fill it full of full of french fries.

However, that evening aside, we managed to keep everyone happy when we stumbled upon a vegetarian Indian restaurant which served the most sublime veggie curries I’ve ever tasted. It was an unassuming little place and was manned by just two people – a chef and a waiter. But there was no stopping us returning as often as we could over the course of the holiday.

Which is all a long way round telling you that there is an easier way of doing this, without risking fisticuffs with your best friends. It’ s called ‘Veggie Places’. They have a little widget which lets you type in the name of the place or the postcode and voila, it’ll return results with the vegetarian restaurants it has listed. Which would cut down your guesswork considerably. Very handy.

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